So where was I? Oh yes I was gonna talk about my experiences with the Hong Kong police, so here goes. OK this is the problem, whenever I visit Hong Kong I always have the fear of being questioned by the police, well not exactly fear because I've got nothing to hide, but whenever I am alone walking on the street and a policeman on patrol sees me, they would ALWAYS 100% stop and ask for my ID. For those ain't familiar with how things work in Hong Kong is that if they see a teenager (Especially male) on the street not in their school uniform during school time or with dyed hair or pretty much just 'gangster' or suspicious looking, they have the right to stop you in the middle of nowhere and question you. Now I match every bit of suspicion possible, what they are trying to check is if there's any sort of crime around the area so they can narrow down the suspects, or to check whether you are legal to be in Hong Kong, or whether you've got drugs on you. Anyway when I was in Hong Kong a month ago, I got a total of three encounters with the police, much less than I expected but I played it smart this year around, I wore a hat to cover up the blonde hair and whenever I see a policemen walking towards me I would take another route, NOT because I got anything to hide (And I've got nothing to hide except for me and my monkey) but because its embarrassing when I am being questioned on the street in front of hundreds of local Hong Kongers judging you as they walk by.
FIRST ENCOUNTER: This happened the day after I landed in hong kong, thats right! The day after! Woah! I was with my family in a restaurant and I had to walk out on the street by myself to look for a toilet. Two policemen spotted me and immediately stopped me, they asked for my ID. I showed them my ID and they started getting chatty, they asked whether I was a hairdresser (Im pretty sure it wasn't a serious question, they were just being dicks), and I thought to myself like what only hairdressers can have trendy dyed final fantasy hair? So I replied politely no. They then asked me what I do for a living (By the way they asked all these in Chinese) and I replied I studied Animation and I draw for a living, but I said the word 'Animation' in english because I forgot what it was in Chinese, the police then asked what Animation was because apparently to be a Policemen in Hong Kong you don't need to learn English, I then hesitated and told them "You know... like Toy Story? Or Shrek? Have you seen those? Like 3D animation that Pixar does... Finding Nemo! Up! The Incredibles!?", I still don't think the policemen believed me because one of them then asked whether I could make something like Toy Story, in which I said "No....." (At that point I really wanted to punch the guy in the face). I then quickly took out my 'Get out of jail free card' aka my Australian Drivers License and explained that I actually live in Australia and only visiting Hong Kong, usually the police go easier on the visitors to Hong Kong after knowing you are a foreigner (And even nicer to the foreigners bloody hell), however that only works when the police believe you are a foreigner... Unfortunately for me my spoken chinese was too perfect, I can speak it fluently (Probably too fluent for people to tell I ain't from around) but cannot write or read most of the words.... Urgh OMG if I can pull off speaking chinese with english accent I would be fine but I suck at those! The police then decided to frisk me.. I have never been frisked before in my life, I felt a little humiliated especially when I was wide in the open on the street with little kids pointing at me and old people looking at me with their disgusted and disappointed look towards the teenagers. When I was being touched I just prayed that they wouldn't touch me in the sensitive area below because I still haven't went to the toilet yet. I swear at one point one of the police grabbed my ass, I am serious! After they were done they smiled at each other and smoked a cigarette.... wait a minute that didn't actually happen. After they were done they just let me go, end of first encounter. I went home that night, took out a doll to show my grandma where the police touched me.
SECOND IMPACT: You can't make this shit up but the second encounter with the police was the day after...... Trust me at that point I thought I was gonna be questioned by the police at least 20 times before I leave Hong Kong. This time I was once again just innocently browsing toys and comics on the street when a policemen came up to me and started questioning me, this time I was more prepared, I was more collected and I found out what the chinese word for Animation was. I showed the police my ID and put my hands on my head against the wall spread my leg and said 'Go ahead Sonny. We ain't got all day.' But surprisingly this time around the police didn't frisk me, but was even quite polite. I answered his questions appropriately and I was free to go without any problems, I was shocked by how well it went, we even had a lovely talk about the animation business in Australia compared with Hong Kong, I wanted to ask if he wanted to hang out after his shift but stopped myself when I came to my senses. I think what made the second encounter go smoothly was because I wasn't nervous, when I get nervous I mess up my words and can't act naturally, maybe thats why the police were so suspicious of me the first time... hell I nearly even peed my pants!
THIRD STRIKE: It has been weeks since I got questioned by the police, I played my game very safe. I became more alert of the men in uniform, I was so alert that I would walk away just by a sight of a guy in a hat. During my trip in Hong Kong I had a lot of free time so I would usually go to the arcades and spend money on Street Fighter since the game is so cheap in Asian countries, I have discovered that the cleaner and expensive looking the arcade is, the worse the street fighter players are. But if you go to the dirty smoke filled ones with gangsters looking men filled with tattoos of dragons and tigers on their chest and dotted line on their neck as if telling people to cut here, you can find some pretty decent players! I have always wanted to improve my game so I usually go to the gangster ones. I had a couple of rounds one night and as I was leaving, coincidentally a group of 5 police officers came in to ask for people's ID. I was unfortunate because as I was leaving and I think the police thought I was trying to run away..... So like the usual I had to show my ID and explain what animation is and explain what my favourite Disney films is.... Then they checked my bag and asked why I had so many Pokemon toys, I just had to be honest and said I liked Pokemon, the police gave me a look, kinda like a 'Shouldn't you be too old for these type of stuff?' kinda look. They then asked me to take out my phone, thats when I got nervous... OK this is what happened... I have an Iphone I use in Australia but only when I took it to Hong Kong that I found out you cannot use a Hong Kong SIM card on an Australian Iphone, you have to jailbreak it first (And I think by now you know I like to do things legally. I wouldn't import Mortal Kombat to Australia, I don't use a bootleg version of Photoshop and I don't download music. I always ask myself 'What would Batman Do?') There's always this debate about whether jailbreaking your phone is legal in Australia or not... But however I don't see a point in Jailbreaking my Iphone. But when I got questioned by the police... I started to regret not Jailbreaking... Alright since I couldn't use my iphone I had to borrow my aunty's old mobile phone, so whenever I go out I use my aunty's one for phone calls and my Iphone for music and photos. I showed both my phones to the police and they asked why I had two phones, I explained the SIM card not compatible with the iphone etc. And the police took my aunty's phone and saw a picture of my 10 year old cousin, she was just smiling innocently in the photo. The police then asked who that was and I was nervous and told him that was my cousin.. he then started looking at other photos and they were just filled with photos of my cousin! She was in her summer clothing in some of them, she was doing many interesting poses and in one of them she was even in her ballerina outfit with her other ballerina friends doing the spread Not a single photo of me in it! I thought to myself 'OH FUCK this is it, yup I am going to jail... either that or I am gonna be on predator watch for the rest of my life'. I explained to the police that the phone was my aunty's and that was her daughter, the police then stared at me for what felt like a whole 10 second, he then flicked through the contact list and asked me to name a few contacts to prove that the phone was mine, guess what? My mind went absolutely blank, its one of those moments where you are under pressure and you need to think of something easy and for whatever reason you can't do it. I took the time to collect myself and managed to tell him a total of TWO contact out of the possible twenty.... The officers looked at me for a while and said I could go. OH THANK YOU JESUS I took back my two phones and Pokemon toys and left the place as quickly as possible.
So what did I learn from these police incidents? Absolutely nothing. I mean to be honest they are just doing their job, it is their duty to look out for anyone suspicious.... just so happen I fit the bill. I remember when I saw my relatives, they told me I should cut my hair and dye it back to black in case I get questioned by the police, but I didn't, because I've got nothing to hide. Why would I need to blend in with the local when I am not a local? I will do something about my hair if I am importing drugs next time how about it? Yo I will even put on dorky glasses and wear a tie and a business suit if I am doing something illegal you know what I mean? *sigh* Am I glad to be back in good old Sydney where you can wear anything you want and have the funkiest final fantasy hair and no police will ever question you, strange I still weird looks from Asians in Australia though. OK next time for my visit in Hong Kong I am gonna perfect my a fake Australian accent to my fluent Chinese.
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